Hot Sex Instead of Dancing Ch. 14

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Tiffany discovers that her next door neighbor, Walter, is a cross dresser.

"Walter?"

Walter heard a voice that he immediately recognized. Cringing at the sound of her voice when he usually rejoiced at the sound of her voice, he was already turning a bright red in anticipation of her seeing him and him seeing her. Never thinking that he wouldn't even get out of his house with someone seeing him, he wished he was dead. In a neighborhood where no one is out and about unless they're walking their dog or late for work, he couldn't believe he's already busted.

"Is that you?"

As if he was caught stealing he turned to face his neighbor to give her an embarrassed smile.

"It is you. I don't believe it. I nearly didn't recognize you," she said leaning down to his car window to practically stick her pretty face inside of his car. "Something tells me that you're not dressed for Halloween," she said with a laugh while looking at his wig, his makeup, and his dress.

"Hi Tiffany," he said wishing he was dead again.

"Hi Walter," she said. "What's ya doin'?"

"Um, just going for a ride," he said.

"My God," she said with a laugh as if she hadn't noticed. "Correct me if I'm wrong but are you a cross dresser?" When he didn't answer her, she made her own assumption based on the obvious facts that he was wearing a wig, makeup, and a dress. "You're a cross dresser. I don't believe you're a cross dresser," she said. "Cute dress," she said with a laugh.

When he looked out his car window at her, he couldn't believe Tiffany, his best friend's wife, the imagined love of his life, was standing there with the same shocked look on her face that he had on his face. With him so very excited and with today starting out as the best day of his life, he was ready to go out in the world for the first time while dressed as a woman. He was all set to hit a mall a few towns away to shop for panties and shoes. Now the worst day of his life, instantly he was depressed?

He suddenly felt in the way that Charles Dickens must have felt when he wrote the Tale of Two Cities. "It was the best of times. It was the worst of times." Only in his case, 'It was the best of days. It was the worst of days.' With him sitting in his car dressed as a woman, what can he possibly say to her to change her mind from thinking that there's something seriously wrong with him?

No doubt about it. For him to want to dress up as a woman, there is something seriously wrong with him. Only he can't help himself. As if turning on a comfort switch, he feels so much better when wearing women's clothes. He feels human when dressed as a woman. He feels as if he's finally being true to himself when wearing women's clothes.

Yet, with Tiffany seeing him dressed as a woman, the one person he didn't want to know that he crossed dressed, he was humiliated. With his head already hung down in shame, he'll never be able to look her in the eye again. Now, whatever sexual fantasies, hopes, and sexual desires he had of her were not only tainted by him being a cross dresser but also by her knowing that he's a cross dresser.

If only she could have found out his secret after they had sex, he'd wouldn't so mind her finding out that he cross dresses. Only, who is he kidding? Someone who looks like her would never have sex with someone who looks like him, especially now that she knows that he's crazy. Then, when she tells her husband, Bill would no longer think of him as a friend but as some deranged lunatic who enjoys parading around while wearing women's clothes.

He was done. He was finished. He'll be the talk of the town. He'll be fired from his job. He'll have to move. He'll have to kill himself. Maybe he can just make up a story and tell her that the reason why he's dressed as a woman is because he's working undercover for the CIA, the FBI, or Homeland Security. Nah, with Bill a police officer, no doubt he could easily reach out to verify and uncover that lie with all the contacts he knows and the connections he has in law enforcement.

"Oh God. I'm so embarrassed," he said looking from the fantasy love of his life to look down at himself in shame. "My first time out of my house dressed as a woman, I wanted to go for a ride while wearing women's clothes," he said feeling like such a shit instead of feeling like the pretty woman he was when he started backing out of his driveway. "I was hoping to go to the mall a few towns over to buy some panties and perhaps a pair of shoes," he said.

Taking a step back and putting a hand on her hip as if she was holding a hairbrush, she looked at him as if she was a hair and makeup artist instead of his next door, hot neighbor.

"Actually with a better hairstyle and better application of your makeup, you wouldn't be such a bad looking woman. With your small features, I could actually make you look pretty. I've seen strippers who were born female who look worse than you do," she said with a laugh.

Of all the people to bump into, he couldn't believe he ran into Tiffany not ten feet from his house.

"I was hoping that no one would see me," he said. "I'm so very embarrassed with you, of all people, knowing my dirty, little sexual secret."

She patted his shoulder and gave him a look of sympathy as if giving him her condolences for the old Walter who had died when he donned a dress. No longer wanting to hide himself anymore, with nothing left to be embarrassed about, Walter stepped from his car to give her the full treatment of him dressed as a woman. Ready to flee and run in his house and hide there forever, he turned as if he was a ballerina, bowed as if he was a princess curtseying to the queen, and smiled while wishing he was her lover. Yet, now that all was lost, he was doomed to live in shame forever.

"You're embarrassed? Walter, c'mon, seriously. You're talking to a woman who used to strip off her clothes while dancing around a pole for a living," she said shaking her head.

With her telling him things and feeling that he never knew about her, he looked at her with new insight into how she felt about stripping.

"Stripping must have been hard for you," he said while hoping to find a common ground.

She looked at him, rolled her eyes, and sighed.

"You have no idea," she said. "I'm embarrassed whenever I see some fool in the supermarket who recognizes me as Crystal, my stripping stage name, and who looks at me as if I'm standing there naked with a pole between my legs. Trust me, there ain't no secrets that you can tell me that I haven't heard already," she said waving her manicured finger in his face.

He looked at her with shame, while shockingly enough, she looked at him with sexual excitement. He wondered what that was about. Was she sexually turned on by him or with him cross dressing? Maybe she has a kinky, hot side that he doesn't know about.

"Please don't tell Bill. I'm embarrassed enough already," he said hanging his head in humiliation. "I don't want to lose him as a friend."

She made a face as if she had just eaten a bug.

"Don't be silly," said Tiffany. "My very best, special friend, Stephen, also known as Stephanie, an old lover of mine, was a cross dresser," she said waving a hand of understanding. "We had a thing going for a couple of years a lifetime ago and I told Bill about him when I asked him to dress up as a woman for me."

"Wait, you asked Bill, big, bad Bill, to dress as a woman?"

"I did," she said laughing.

Walter looked at her with shocked surprise. He imagined Bill looking much like Lurch of the Addams Family while wearing a dress. He imagined his friend looking much like Herman Munster of the Munster's while wearing a wig, makeup, and high heels. He' imagined Bill looking like Rob Gronkowski, Gronk, the 6'5", The Terminator, the 260 pound, star tight end of the New England Patriots looking ridiculous while wearing a dress."

"Bill dressed as a woman?" He was stunned. He couldn't believe it. With his squared off Marine Corps drill sergeant type jaw, he couldn't even imagine how strange Bill would look dressed as a woman. "Bill's a cross dresser too?"

She made that face again as if she had swallowed another bug.

"Bill? A cross dresser? Let's be serious Walter. With Bill all man, a man's man, and a macho man, Bill wouldn't so much as use my pink, hair brush or put on my pink, rubber gloves, never mind him wearing my clothes," she said with a loud laugh.

Suddenly the image of Tiffany standing at the sink while wearing nothing but her pink, rubber gloves filled his horny brain. He could clearly see her tits as if she was standing before him topless. Damn, she had such a spectacular body and such perfect breasts.

"So tell me more about your cross dressing friend."

She smiled at him as if she was remembering him. She smiled at him as if he was there with her now. She smiled at him as if suddenly shared a secret with a girlfriend.

"Being that you shared your cross dressing secret with me, I'll share my sexy secret with you," she said pausing to look at his reaction to her telling him a sexy secret.

He could only imagine what kind of sexy secret a stripper would have.

"Okay," he said. "I like hearing sexy secrets."

He imagined her into group sex. He imagined her having sex with a woman. He imagined her blindfolded and tied to the bed in the way that he blindfolded and tied his wife to the bed. He imagined her being into tickling, spanking, or golden showers.

"You must promise you won't laugh or judge me if I tell you my sexy secret," she said.

As if standing in a courtroom while being sworn in, Walter raised his right hand.

"I promise not to laugh or to judge you," he said while eager to hear Tiffany's sexy secret.

She paused while looking at him. Seemingly in the way she looked so nervous telling him what she was about to tell him, this must be some kind of sexy secret.

"I haven't even told this to Bill," she said.

Now he really couldn't wait to hear her sexy secret.

"You can tell me. Your sexy secret is safe with me. I promise not to tell anyone your sexy secret, Tiffany," said Walter.

He wondered if her sexy secret had something to do with the pink, rubber gloves she wears when washing those few, delicate items that aren't dishwasher safe.

"He used to enjoy having sex with me while he was dressed as a woman," she said looking at him to see how her sexy secret was received before continuing. When she was seemingly satisfied that he wouldn't laugh and/or judge her, she continued. "I had a thing for having sex with a man who more looked like a woman than he did a man," she said.

"Wow," said Walter while imagining Tiffany having sex with him when he was dressed as a woman.

His sexual fantasy come true, not only would he want to have sex with Tiffany but also he'd love to have sex with Tiffany while dressed as a woman.

"Who knows, with me never having sex or wanting to have sex with a woman, maybe I have lesbian tendencies. Maybe I'm a closet lesbian," said Tiffany. "I associated with plenty of strippers who were lesbians. If only some of those horny men knew that the stripper they were watching undress would rather lick a pussy than suck a cock, I wonder what they'd say."

Not only did the love of his life have sex with a cross dresser while he was dressed as a woman but also she has a thing for having sex with a man who looks more like a woman. He couldn't believe it. He couldn't have scripted this any better than if he wrote it himself.

"Definitely, they'd want their dollars back," said Walter with a laugh.

What? This is so totally bizarre. Tiffany had a cross dressing lover named Stephen who went as Stephanie? She enjoyed having sex with a man who looked more like a woman? Get outta town. Fuck me. Maybe there's hope for him having sex with her after all.

Unfortunately, immediately bursting his bubble of hope, the only problem he had between him having his wicked sexual way with Tiffany while he was dressed as a woman is Bill, a man about 6'4" tall and weighing about 260 pounds. Walter may look, which he's done plenty of times before while watching Tiffany cleaning her kitchen in her sexy nightgown, her little barely there bathrobe, and now naked except for her pink, rubber gloves but he'd never, ever touch the wife of his best friend, a man who wears a badge and carries a gun for a living.

"Do you have a name?"

As if telling her his secret identity, he smiled at the thought of sharing his secret, sexy, woman's name with Tiffany.

"Wendy. I go by Wendy whenever I'm cross dressing," he said. "I've always liked that name for some reason. Not knowing anyone named Wendy, except for the redhead from Wendy's restaurant, I don't know why I like that name, I just do. Besides being that it begins with a W and has two syllables, it's a name that's similar to Walter...Wendy, Walter, Walter, Wendy."

With his eyes wide open while staring at her with her eyes suddenly shut closed, she took a step forward and kissed him. She didn't kiss him on his forehead or on his cheek, but she kissed him on the lips. Albeit just a peck, she kissed him. Always wondering what it would feel like for his lips to touch her lips, he couldn't believe that Tiffany kissed him nonetheless.

"You're sweet," she said. "Okay, here goes. I'm going to tell you my sexy secret," she said taking a big breath.

He touched her hand before squeezing her hand.

"Trust me, you'll feel better sharing your sexy secret with someone," he said while imagining Tiffany being tied to his bed blindfolded, him peeing on her, him tickling her, or her over his knee while he spanked her shapely ass red.

While returning the squeeze of her hand with the squeeze of his hand, she looked at him and smiled.

"For some strange reason, if I have any fetish at all, I can't control myself around cross dressers. For some strange reason, I've been sexually attracted to them for as long I can remember," she said letting go of his hand to clutch her breasts with both hands in the way that he wished he was feeling her big tits with his two hands.

What? Huh? She can't control herself around cross dressers? And with him standing there wearing a wig, makeup, and a dress, are you kidding me? Does that mean what he thinks it means? In the way she had a sexual affair with a cross dresser, is she thinking about having a sexual affair with him now too? Only, suddenly thinking of Quentin Tarantino's movie, Kill Bill, he'd have to find a way to kill Bill first," he thought.

Quickly he moved from sanity to lunacy to before returning to his senses. He could never kill Bill. Bill was his best friend. Maybe he'd just club him over the head hard enough for him to have brain damage and not remember that he's married to Tiffany while thinking that Walter is.

"I'm sorry, please forgive me Tiffany and I hope you don't take this the wrong way but suddenly I imagine you stripping off all of your clothes to give me hot sex. I apologize for having such inappropriate thoughts about your naked body. Please forgive me. Yet, with that out of the way, I'm just curious," said Walter as Wendy.

He looked at her as if she was standing there naked when she was wearing a bathrobe over one of her sexy nightgowns.

"What are you curious about Walter? Sorry. I mean Wendy," said Tiffany.

"When you said that you're unable to control yourself around cross dressers, exactly what did you mean by you being unable to control yourself around a cross dresser?"

Giving him a look that curled his pubic hair, she gave him a sexy look that he only imagined her giving him in his sexual fantasies of her while imagining her naked and having hot sex with him.

"Lemme put it this way Wendy. In the way of 'it is what it is,' well 'it is isn't always what it is.' Helter-skelter, topsy-turvy, Humpty-Dumpty, inside out and right side in, I like things that aren't always what they appear to be," she said. "Give me puzzles and riddles to boring facts and information any day. I prefer playing impromptu games than to adhere to rules and following a routine," she said. "Right up my alley, cross dressers are fun and cops are not."

In the way he confessed his internal, sexual, secret self by being dressed as a woman, she was confessing her internal, sexual, secret self by allowing him a glimpse in her personal life. He's known this woman for six years and except for her gorgeous outside appearance, he never had a glimpse of the real Tiffany until now. He couldn't believe all that she was saying. He couldn't believe the personal things she was sharing with him. If he knew that it would take him to dress up as a woman to get to know Tiffany better, he would have exposed himself as a cross dresser years ago by parading around in front of her dressed as a woman.

"Thank you for answering my question but I still don't fully understand how you're unable to control yourself around a cross dresser?"

He needed her to spell it out for him in black and white so that he wouldn't pay the price of initiating an extramarital affair with a married woman. He needed her to spell it out for him in black and white so that he wouldn't pay the deadly price of initiating an extramarital affair with a woman who's married to a big, bad cop. She looked at him in the way he imagined her looking at him if she wanted to suck him. She looked at him in the way he imagined her looking at him if she wanted to fuck him. She looked at him in the way he imagined her looking at him when she was ready for sex.

"My favorite candy is one that has bittersweet chocolate. I love the sweet with the bitter taste just as I love making out with a man who's dressed as a woman. My favorite Chinese food dish is sweet and sour chicken. I love finding that hard surprise between the legs of a man who's dressed like a woman when we get right down to business," she said holding her hand by his crotch and leaving it there until he developed a throbbing erection.

He looked at her with confusion while she looked at him with sexual arousal. He couldn't believe that Tiffany wasn't offended that he was a cross dresser. He couldn't believe she had a sexual affair with a man who was a cross dresser. He couldn't believe her thing was to have sex with a man while he was dressed as a woman. He couldn't believe that she was holding her palm against his emerging erection. Then, when he looked down after she removed her hand from his bulging penis, giving proof positive that he wasn't a woman but a man, he couldn't believe his erection showed through his dress.

"What about Bill?"

If ever Bill discovered him having sex with Tiffany, he imagined his friend beating him senseless and being tasered before being shot and arrested for resisting arrest.

"What about Bill?" She gave him an unconcerned look. "Newsflash. You probably don't know this, Wendy, but Bill..." she said pausing for effect, "would much rather have sex with Linda than to have sex with me."

Walter couldn't believe what he was hearing. In the way that he wants to have sex with Tiffany he couldn't believe that Bill wants to have sex with Linda. No way! Are you kidding me? Oh my God! Why would Bill want Linda over Tiffany?

"I don't believe it," he said. "Bill would rather have sex with Linda, my middle-age housewife, over having sex with you, a hot, young, black, ex-stripper? My God, what is wrong with this picture?"

Walter shook his head in disbelief while looking at Tiffany as if she was kidding or lying to him.

"Yes, Bill has been lusting over Linda for years. Every time she's in the garden digging up the ground, planting her vegetables, or harvesting them, he watches her through his binoculars while masturbating himself. Linda as inadvertently or deliberately, I don't know which, given my husband plenty of down blouses of her cleavage and bra and plenty of up skirts of her panties," said Tiffany.