Consent Ch. 08

Author's Notes:

(1) My FULL APOLOGIES for my goof in Chapter 7, which one of my readers pointed out. The woman who trained Johanna and who also gave Jackie the beating, was Gwen, NOT Yvette. Maybe Yvette is her middle name, but it's no excuse; I screwed up in the most amateur fashion, forgetting my own characters' names.

(2) Chapter 8 is a setup chapter. There is an underlying bizarre eroticism of Femdom, "forced" feminization and humiliation, but for those of you who like this stuff (there are a few, and more than you think), the climax will come at a later time. Sorry, but that's just life.

(3) This chapter, like the last one, contains nasty stuff, displaying weakness opposed to opportunistic strength and psychopathy. But it is necessary in order to completely annihilate Jack's prior personality. Why, you ask? Because it's a story, and really mean people only live in stories, right? Now do you get it? Mean people really do exist in real life, and bizarre things do happen. You say it's not real...could not be real...so what? Relax and enjoy the story, or scoff and rate it 1 out of 5; I don't care. Actually I do...sniff, sniff.

(4) As I've said before, these people in this story are strange, to say the least. But just remember that Johanna is only acting out her power fantasy on a person who wants it to happen. Jack has an internal fight. One minute he resists the pull of fantasy, the next he lets himself be taken by it, and there is no escape for him, even without the presence of Johanna. This is the key to the story; he is in an internal conflict and is seeking a happy, safe place.

(5) The gender change for singular 3rd person for Jack is intentional.

(6) Please don't do any of this at home, unless you have everyone's consent (tongue in cheek), and even then, I would not recommend breath play or golden showers to anyone. And do not attempt to destroy another person's psyche; it's dangerous and cruel.

(7) Unless he consents to it. Damn...

*****

Why had this happened? What had brought her to this point? Was it loneliness; was it need, want, or all of them at once? And why was she always in a state of arousal?

Jaqueline awoke early and was sitting in her cell on the edge of the bed, still dressed in yesterday's bra and girdle. Pressure mounted in her anal area as it had been two days since her last enema. She felt the slight urgency but also knew that the anal plug would eliminate any chance for accidental...umm, leakage.

She stared at her nails, still bright red, feminine and long, and touched them to her face, then down to her firm, smooth, hairless body. Her penis was hard and erotically compressed by the girdle against her abdomen.

Odd, she thought; she was sitting here thinking she was a woman, and it felt comfortable, not solely erotic like it used to when she dressed up, alone as a woman. Something had changed. It had to be the consent, the now unspoken consent she had given to Johanna to own her and use her as she saw fit, and it had culminated with the decision to stay last night and lock her own cell door. This was the end of the road for Jack, the start of it for Jaqueline.

But why?

Yes, it felt "right" for many reasons. But how would she explain this to her brothers if they visited? And eventually they would. She was employed as a sexual prop in the porn industry. Not only that, but she would be transitioning to be a woman...not all the way, mind you, but far enough. By the end of February she would have breasts, and her permanent body and facial hair removal would be well on its way by then too. These were things she could not step back from once experienced; they were permanent. She would be Jaqueline. She already felt like Jaqueline. And how would she explain that she was owned by Johanna? Did she dare tell her brothers that? It made no rational sense, but here she was believing it to be true.

She snickered softly into the early morning promise of her day as she realized she was talking to herself as a woman. Jack was gone.

Jackie remembered the old Moody Blues album her parents used to play. She was just a boy then. God it was so bleak! Oddly, the one song she remembered wasn't a song at all; it was more of an epilogue to the song "Nights in White Satin", and it was spoken to music, not sung.

"Breathe deep the gathering gloom.

Watch lights fade from every room.

Bedsitter people look back and lament.

Another day's useless energy spent.

Impassioned lovers wrestle as one.

Lonely man cries for love and has none.

New mother picks up and suckles her son.

Senior citizens wish they were young.

Cold hearted orb that rules the night,

Removes the colors from our sight.

Red is grey and yellow white.

But we decide which is right.

And which is an illusion?"

The last five lines were the ones she recited now in her head. But there were no illusions now. She had chosen what the colors were. Others would disagree, but did that really matter?

Jackie had awakened early, knowing what was facing her today. She shuddered at the thought. Periodically she acknowledged she was crazy to have locked herself back into this cell knowing full well that Johanna was going to use her for abject entertainment today. It had been explained to her on the very first interview she had with Johanna on Day One that she would be strapped down and her head sealed into a toilet-like affair, and to beware of thinking she could handle anything. That was so long ago. Now she would be forced to look upward as Johanna's urine rained down upon her face until she was forced to drink it or drown.

She shuddered in disgust, but there was something else, something calling her. She could resist, but that would only make it worse. The trap had sprung. If she did resist, she would not receive food until such a time as she complied. Then she would not only have to endure the golden shower, but be beaten as well, as punishment for disobedience. Choice had been removed, and paradoxically, she had made the choice to allow its removal.

So, when Johanna arrived to take her away, she would go willingly, although she knew she would be led away in physical bondage, more as a symbol than of necessity. Jackie would do anything Johanna asked of her now. She was her slave. There was no turning back, for there was nothing to turn back to.

Nothing. That sounded like a rock hitting the moist muddy bottom of a deep, dry well. Thud.

Everything lay ahead. The feminization, the corseting, the hair removal, the hair styling, the sexual slavery. It was clear and simple.

She. Her. Hers. Jaqueline. Jackie. Transsexual. Slave. These names and words belonged to her now.

Clearing her head, she decided to get ready. First, she peeled off her girdle and removed the stainless steel anal plug, placing it in the shower to be washed and re-inserted after she emptied her bowels and had a further enema. Without the plug, the urgency to go accelerated, and for the first time since she had arrived here, she had a natural bowel movement. Knowing there would be more, she gave herself a full enema and flushed the toilet. This was so sick, she thought. But there was no other choice. Removing her bra and wig, she stepped into the shower and washed thoroughly, taking care to shave all parts of her body below her eyebrows. It was tedious and time-consuming as always. Lubricating the anal plug, she pushed it back in with ease, loving the feel of it now, like it possessed her. She had a desperate urge to masturbate, but knowing that she was under video surveillance, she wisely declined on that, as it was a punishable offence. She trusted in Johanna to take care of that for her when she saw fit. It was not her decision to make.

Next she made extra efforts to get her makeup right this morning, carefully blending in foundation, color, and highlighting to accentuate her cheek bones and to make her chin look smaller. The eyes were difficult, but she worked them with slow and deliberate detail, the eyeliner, mascara and eyeshadow. She followed this with lip liner and filled it in with a rose colored lipstick that she really liked. It matched the universally pink underwear that Johanna had bought for her...always pink.

She buffed her nails and attached the short blond wig, brushing it out so it framed her face in a coquettish way, before going to the bureau and searching the myriad combinations of bras, panties, girdles, corselets, garter belts, and stockings. She held up the impossibly small looking corselet, the one that she had looked at before which had no attached bra, only shoulder straps, and she smiled. Yes, very nice. But first the bra, a full figure one with substantial straps. Doing up the hook-and-eye closure behind her back was easy now, and she adjusted it at the front before dropping in the D-size silicone inserts. They bounced slightly before coming to rest, removing part of the view of her feet. Still a strange feeling, she thought, and she wondered what it would be like to have the real thing in another 2-3 months. She ran her hands over the satin of the cups, trying to imagine the feel of her fingers on real skin in the bra when that time came.

She shivered.

Next she squirmed into the corselet, tugging and pulling until the straps were over her shoulders and the top of it was pushing her bra and breasts slightly upward and inward. She was shocked at how much looseness in her skin was tightened up by such a garment. There was no need to hold her stomach in now; the corselet did it for her, in addition to flattening her penis against her abdomen, essentially making it disappear. The "boy-legs" compressed her thighs as well, right down to the top of her knees. She was thankful that it was an open-crotch style, because she couldn't imagine having to remove the whole thing just to have a pee.

Realizing there were no attached garters and not wanting to wear pantyhose, she searched the top drawer and found a formidable garter belt with six garters that rattled as she wrapped it around her waist and did up the hook and eye closure. The sheer stockings attached with ease and she bent down to make sure they held, the garters pulling in that strangely erotic, feminine, and mysterious way with every movement. Such a secret world women lived in! Clothing donned and attached in enigmatic ways, bondage in its own right, to be fumbled with and undone by unknown lovers.

Pulling up a pair of lacy panties, she sat on the edge of the bed and waited for her owner. Johanna would tell her what else to wear, if anything. As yet, the new Jaqueline identity still had male taste in outer clothing, and she had to be guided in every detail of that.

It was 7:00 AM. Jackie refreshed her lipstick and waited. The air conditioner kicked in. In the distance there was the sound of a door closing. Her breathing rate increased and she hoped she looked as feminine as possible for Johanna. The human toilet would be bad enough; she didn't want to be punished for poor feminine preparation as well. A voice way back inside her head asked her why pleasing Johanna was now so important. The voice was reprimanded and squashed like a bug. Silly thoughts.

"You look lovely," Johanna said as she neared the cell door, setting down a plate of scrambled eggs and bacon with hash browns and toast. Coffee swirled in a cup and spilled slightly, its aroma filling the room quickly. She was fully dressed the part this morning, in black leather of course, a strict and severe corset and stiletto boots covering stockings attached to long garters.

"Thank-you ma'am." Jackie's heart pounded with respect and lust. She licked her lipstick, and her penis convulsed in futile hope between her abdomen and her corselet.

"Come to the restraint opening please. You'll be restrained all day today, as I'm sure you are aware."

Choice. Be bound and fed, or unbound and hungry. And alone.

As Johanna slipped the thick gauge rubber bondage mittens onto Jackie's arms, she added, "Sorry I didn't come back to you last night. I got a bit carried away with Geoffrey. Almost killed him actually. Bad form on my part, but he's okay. It was fun actually. Even he said so, the poor strange man."

"Ma'am?"

She pushed the last mitten hard upward and Jackie struggled for balance. Locking it in place she said, "Yeah, I plugged his breathing tube a bit too long and I had to resuscitate him."

"You stopped his breathing?" There was a reason she was asking this at this moment. Her wrists were being locked together, and the final clink of the lock made the answer seem unnecessary; she was hers for whatever she desired now anyway.

"Oh yes. It's a power play of mine. I control everything in your life and his, including breathing. You'll see. It's within my power to take your life now. So easy. Want to see?" She said this so lightly, Jackie's heart skipped and leaped with erotic fear.

"Uh, no thanks ma'am."

"Nonsense! Let's do a little demo, okay?" She walked to the cell door and waved her proximity card to open it, reaching back briefly to the wall and grabbing something Jackie could not see.

"That's okay ma'am. I'll pass."

But she was ripping off a large swath of duct tape already, and she slammed it hard against Jackie's mouth, pushing and sealing it to her skin, so that she could only breathe through her mouth. She ripped off another piece and quickly sealed her nose as well. Standing back, she watched her panic, with her cheeks going in and out in futility, and her hands grasping at air behind her back. Her eyes pleaded.

Johanna watched her calmly and said, "See? I control everything. Don't I?"

Jackie was squealing with horror, and her eyes were getting larger by the second while her face reddened. She couldn't grasp the concept that Johanna had asked her a question that she was required to answer.

Johanna asked again, "I control everything, don't I?"

It took a moment, but Jackie, in absolute terror, answered by nodding her head emphatically and squealing like a little girl under the tape.

"Good. I'm going to remove the tape and fix your makeup. You won't say a word. You are to remain silent."

When the tape was finally stripped off, Jackie frantically gasped in the fresh air. When she calmed down, Johanna serenely applied the appropriate makeup to fix everything to the way it was before. But Jackie knew it wasn't the same. This was a message. Nothing could ever be the same.

Johanna spoon fed the breakfast to her in silence. But she watched her slave with delight. Jackie was truly beautiful this morning, a magnificent submissive slave. She really didn't want to follow through on the promised plan from yesterday, but she knew she had to. It would be the royal seal on the slavery envelope so to speak. Jackie could have left last night, but she chose to stay and to submit to this ultimate degradation. She knew it was coming, and she still chose to stay. She needed it for some reason, and she was obliged to force her to endure it. Life and fantasies were strange, and she had given up trying to understand either long ago. She would be pushing Jackie's limits to the borders of sanity today. It had begun already.

Johanna sipped constantly on a bottle of water and smiled. Jackie watched and knew she would be drinking the very same water very soon.

"Sit on the edge of your bed please," Johanna said as she brought out a pair of knee-high leather boots and placed them beside Jackie. She had her squeeze each foot in, and then tediously drew in the laces, pulling them tight to the tie-off at the top. Jackie sat passively, glad to be alive and breathing.

When Jackie stood up in them, she felt the tight pressure of them on her calves and ankles, and her knees reflexively bent forward because of the extreme height of the heels. She struggled for balance uneasily.

"Straighten your knees and thrust your hips forward," Johanna ordered.

"Yes ma'am."

"That's all you need for today. Now follow me. And walk like a woman for God's sake!"

Jackie had no choice but to follow anyway, as a leash had been attached to her stainless steel slave collar, and she was forcibly being led away. Walking as straight as possible, she followed past all the other cell doors except Cell B, which she entered now. It smelled of rubber, and there were endless hoods, masks, and full body suits hanging from hooks on the walls adjacent to numerous complicated bondage items. The usual chains hung from the ceiling, and they were either attached to electric winches, or to mechanical ratchet winches, presumably to suspend hapless sex slaves and make them even more helpless.

As she took it all in, she was taken by surprise as a box-like device was slipped over her head from behind. It had a very tight fitting latex neck-sealing collar, and as she tried to figure out its intent, she felt the sides squeeze in on her ears, chin, and upper forehead as Johanna squeezed the inflating device repeatedly. Soon she could barely hear her, and her cheeks puffed slightly outwards from the pressure seal along her jaw line and chin.

With shock, Jackie realized what it was. Johanna wasn't wasting any time. All Jackie could see now was straight ahead, and peripherally there were walls of inflated rubber sealing her face forward to the open front of the box.

"No! Oh jeez!" she said reflexively.

Hands grasped her from several points forcing her to sit on the rubber floor matting. Her legs were bound by dozens of leather straps to immobilize them and then her wrists were freed, but only briefly. Someone held her left arm while someone else bound her right arm to the floor. Within short order, she lay there spread-eagled, unable to move any part of her body. Unable to move anything now except her eyes, she watched as the mock-up of the toilet bowl was attached with straps to the lower box where her wild eyes peered upward.

"No! Oh Jesus no!" Jackie couldn't help herself. It had all been so fast, and now the impossible became inevitable.

In Jackie's field of view she saw Louise dressed in a full rubber enclosure suit. Into that view came a smirking Johanna. They were both drinking water, lots and lots of water.

"No, please...I didn't mean it...no...I don't want this. Please Joha, umm, ma'am." But Jackie noted an odd ambivalent feeling of retching at the thought of this, combined with a feeling as though she needed it to happen. Sensing this, Johanna freed Jackie's penis from under the corselet and made it stand erect while at the same time feeling her artificial breasts. It took Jackie's breath away in lust and confusion.

Suddenly Johanna's face was directly above hers and she spoke. "Get comfortable Jackie. You are here for the day. You'll be fed with real food at lunch and supper, that is, if you feel like eating. You will be happy to know that my other paying guests have been told that you are off-limits today. But I will be using you regularly, and I have instructed both Geoffrey and Louise to use you regularly as well. And as you can see, we've decided to be fully hydrated all day today."

She poured a little water into the bowl while she continued to talk. "Now, you'll notice that whatever goes into this bowl has only one way to escape. The edges of your face are sealed tight." She poured some more water in so that the fluid level came up to his lips.

"This is for practice. You have to make sure that you can breathe. I'm going to pour more water in and it's going to go over your mouth and nose. You have to swallow it to stay alive. Do you understand?"

Jackie just whimpered as more water was poured. She panicked and choked, but quickly recovered and drank feverishly until air was available again. She gulped it in thankfully.

"Very good Jackie. You are to be a worthless toilet today. Why is that?"

"Ma'am?" She didn't know what to say, and her hands writhed invisibly within the tethered bondage mittens.