Hair of the Dog Ch. 02

The hike was long, hot, and rugged, of course, but we brought plenty of water along to refresh and rehydrate. The last thing that any of us wished was to suffer heatstroke. Still, it was good to get some exercise, to burn off some calories, and just enjoy each other's company while my dick and their holes recovered from so much wild sex so as to be ready for more.

Seeing the wonders of nature didn't hurt, though we had a slight scare when Moira saw her first coyote and got a little too close. We wisely backed out of what turned out to be the territory of a mother and her cubs. That was when we agreed that we'd had enough and climbed back down to end the hike.

Having been particularly good about our exercise that morning, when we saw a Lenny's, we were quite ready to stop in for a nice, greasy lunch.

We ordered our food, which Shiraz paid for, since she had rich parents, something that I didn't know just yet. I just knew that she seemed to have no shortage of cash flow. I wondered about that, but kept it to myself for now, instead preferring to enjoy her treat, which in my case was a Hickory Burger (a burger with a BBQ sauce and many other toppings to boot) and some wonderful fries with a chocolate malt.

"God, this Polish sausage is to die for, though for me, the tastiest weiner I've ever sampled was Jewish," Shiraz teased me a bit as we ate ... she had elected onion rings with her Polish sausage as well, washed down with a root beer float.

"And his name was Anthony," I quipped, making Shiraz giggle, but shake her head.

"Nope, he was named after a certain general and President," she winked at me.

Moira blushed at that comment, as did I a bit, while eating her own chili cheese fries, which was all she wanted or needed right then. Well, she had a strawberry milkshake, but that was to wash the fries down. That was when we got another picture message, this time showing Jane's tramp stamp, which contained a symbol of a devil's forked tail, pointing downward, and with the words, "Ike's Sassy Succubus."

I chuckled at that, to put it mildly, as did Shiraz and Moira.

"Meet us at Lenny's. Bring your appetite, my naughty little imp," I texted her, to which she replied with a devil face and a heart.

"Wow, you really want to see that ink in person, don't ya? I don't blame you, either. So do I. What about you, Moira?" Shiraz smiled at me and licked her lips.

"What do you think, babe?" Moira snickered as she ran her tongue along the back of my neck, in full view of the other customers.

"Exactly," Shiraz laughed, slipping her fingers down the crotch of my pants.

I was beet-red by now, but most of the patrons acted as if they had seen nothing, which may or may not have been true. Even so, the ladies kept upping the ante between bites of their food, planting kisses on my lips in turns and slipping me more than a little tongue each time ... That drew a cough or time or a disapproving look, as it was more obvious and difficult to hide that they were both amorously involved with me. They also began French kissing each other, not hiding that or being subtle, either. This brought on even more consternation, yet no one made a move to stop us.

What really fucked with their heads was when Jane arrived and gave me a big, wet, sloppy kiss on the mouth, not even making the slightest attempt to hide what she was about. Then, to add insult to injury, she planted lip locks on Moira and Shiraz, too, which finally drove one other diner to the point that he stood and walked over to us. Turning to each of us, red in the face, he took out some literature and was prepared to cite it, if necessary, I suspected.

"Are you married to any of these women?" the clean-shaven, white-haired man asked me.

"Yes, to all three of them," I dared any of them to contradict me, and in fact, Jane squeezed hand with pleasure at this surprise, before going off to order her own food.

"You're a polygamist," he said that as a statement.

"Yes, I would say that I fit the textbook definition of a polygamist. I practice polygamy. Someday, perhaps, I might even perfect it," I waxed witty that time.

"It's illegal," he noted, coughing.

"Not in the form that I practice it. This isn't Utah. I've researched it. As long as I don't get a license for any wives past the first, I'm not breaking any laws. Technically, the only law that I would violate then is the anti-bigamy law, intended more to catch men hiding their second and third wives ... or women hiding their other husbands. I am only legally married to Shiraz here, but I am married in my heart to all three of them," I smiled as I closed the trap on him.

"It's still against God's law, then. You know that the Church abolished plural marriage in 1890, so anyone practicing it now is subject to excommunication, especially if you toss in unnatural acts not even condoned by most FLDS groups," the man retorted.

"Again, you show that a little knowledge can be dangerous. I am not and never was LDS. I'm actually Jewish. My legal wife is a Shia Muslim, I believe, though I'm not sure how devout. I venture a guess that Moira is likely a Roman Catholic, if perhaps lapsed," I laughed at that part.

"Quite lapsed, thank you very much. Haven't been to Mass in literal years," Moira laughed with her melodic Irish accent.

"Ireland?" the man asked her, "I was a missionary to Ireland back in the day. 1969, in fact. The Church sent me there for two years, as usual. And what about you, Miss?"

"Me? I grew up Quaker. Plain and simple folk. Weren't allowed to curse, swear, drink, gamble, or anything like that. Had to eat in simple contemplation, too. Bunch of fucking hypocrites, of course. Talking of the Inner Light, but never following their own. Well, my Inner Light tells me that this is the way to go. Lots of parallels to the LDS, but we never plotted to massacre pioneers," Jane recalled what had happened to one of her ancestors at the Mountain Meadows Massacre.

The man turned red in the face at this historical reference, but there was little he could do about it. All of his assumptions had turned out wrong, including about the law and about me. He sputtered a bit, and then tried to recover by offering us free copies of the Book of Mormon, which we graciously accepted, mostly to get him off our backs. I've read it since ... yeah, I won't get into bashing his faith, but the book didn't exactly change my mind.

Then he turned around and Jane noticed his bulge, which made her giggle. The guy was obviously attracted to at least one of us. It was anyone's guess as to which of us, if not all of us that was. I put it all down to envy and went back to eating my lunch, as did the others.

Jane had a Chicago-style dog herself with fried mushrooms and a Diet Coke (I still don't see the point of diet soda, especially if you eat the usual foods or more). We all enjoyed our flirting and teasing, but the ladies now turned it into an art to tease the various other patrons as well as the staff. The owner or manager or whoever especially got hard when he saw Shiraz for some reason and he wouldn't stop finding excuses to talk to her. We were all amused, but we also agreed that she should find out what he was up to with all of us ... what was the nature of her appeal to him?

Meanwhile, Jane had gone to the ladies' room, only to be confronted by the same elderly Mormon, who pulled her into the men's room to start making out with her at the sink. She later told us that because she actually had to pee badly, she simply bent over, lifted her denim skirt, and pissed on him as he fucked her ... bareback, no less! He panicked, washed off the pee, and rushed back to his wife, much to her (and later our) amusement. His reaction had been pure envy or jealousy after all, as I often suspected with religious bigots.

"What, no kiss?" Jane called to him as he tried to hide what he did from his wife.

"He'll still have to explain the scratch marks on his back. I got him good. Don't worry. He's been married for a long time and this is probably the first time that he's dared to cheat. I suspect that the wife has him on a short leash most of the time and rations the sex to keep it that way. And his faith doesn't allow masturbation, so that's a lot of frustrated lust in the poor guy. Oh, look, the wife has slapped him on the face! She knows what he did! He's looking at us and so is she now!" Jane snickered as the couple now came over together, the wife literally dragging her hubby back by the ear.

"I don't appreciate you committing adultery with my husband! How dare you have sex with him!" the woman demanded, "In public, no less!"

"One of us had to. The poor guy was about to pop. Don't worry. I don't want your man. I got my own, which I gladly share with other women. I just showed some pity on him, that's all. He clearly needed to get laid for a change and you weren't doing the job. You've let all of us ladies down," Jane laughed at the woman's outrage, given everything that happened.

"But ... but that's a sin! It's adultery!" the woman stammered now, stunned by my third wife and her brazenness.

"Hey, what's a little adultery between friends and neighbors, right?" I chimed in.

"And what do you have to say for yourself, Mr. Polygamist?" the wife demanded.

"That out of the abundance with which I was blessed, I deigned to share my bounty with another man, a testament to my generosity of spirit. Truly, I am a righteous man, would you not agree?" I grinned right then, as both of them turned purple in the face.

"Just do yourselves a favor and get some marriage counseling. You clearly need it," Shiraz spoke her own mind.

"Regular sex in the marriage bed wouldn't hurt, either," Moira winked at them.

"Or out of the bed, such as in public men's rooms ... or ladies' rooms ... that was hot, fucking your husband. Not his performance, just the fact of doing it in a public facility with a married man! You should try it some time," Jane snickered, as the couple now stormed off (or the wife did and dragged the husband with her, still by the ear).

Shiraz now lured the manager into the ladies' room, where they stayed for about six minutes before they returned and she wiped her mouth clean in front of everyone present. The meaning of that was unambiguous. She had sucked his cock in public and swallowed his load.

"Well, seems like you got a little extra treat, honey," I chuckled, and then kissed her lips without any shame, to make it quite clear that I was cool with her doing that.

"I'm just glad that you understood ... it's not every husband that gets that I need to do that now and then," Shiraz thanked me.

"It's not every wife that recruits two other wives for her husband, either. Ours is a superior marriage, I think. Wouldn't you agree?" I smiled at them.

"Amen to that!" Jane answered.

"Fuckin' A!" Moira agreed.

"Hell, yeah!" Shiraz concurred.

As we finished up the lunch and headed out, the manager reached out and gave Shiraz two thumbs up, implying that her blowjob had been that damn good. She blew him a kiss and laughed as we headed toward the tattoo parlor. I had some ink to put on my girls. Just because I was sharing them didn't mean that I had no wish to mark them, after all. Something told me that the fun had just begun for the day and I had no idea how right I was.