This is how it feels to be me
at this very moment.
I used to be so many things,
I was an activist for men' rights,
promoting awareness of men's issues
and trying to eliminate anti-male
discrimination.
I went anywhere and did whatever it took.
Rain or shine, I campaigned. I was on the
mission. I had a purpose.
I was a closeted bisexual black man with an
intolerant family who tried to help the other
gays and lesbians out there. I was a young man
looking for love and was unable to find it.
Then, my life went out of control. My family
became verbally and sometimes physically abusive. I felt fear of them. I wanted to leave
but I couldn't. Where would I go ? Who would
take me in ? Could any woman or man love
me ?
So, I remained. I made my own separate peace.
I kept away from them and did my own thing.
I was so scared. I wanted to help myself and
others. I learned to do it. I became a men's
rights activist.
During my struggle, I fell in love with my best
friend Karl. Unfortunately, he was hetero as could
be. I later fell in love with Lauren, a beautiful tomboy from Plymouth. Unfortunately,
she was taken.
So I find myself alone. Without a love of my
own. Struggling to survive. Trying to get back to
school. Trying to make some money. Trying to get
a job. Trying to find someone who could accept me and love me. The search continues.
This is how it feels to be me...forever.
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