The Survivor Contest

I have complained twice about how the Survivor contest works and my complaints were not well received, an understatement. The hostile smugness of the response to my comments surprised me and made me realize that there is nothing funny or fun about the Survivor Contest.

This is a very serious competition, indeed. After all, there is money involved and whenever there is money involved, human nature rears its ugly head and people, in this instance, the contestants, get nasty. Whenever there is the chance of winning prize money, it is a serious competition, is it not?

Let's begin with and breakdown the cash awards for winning this year long Survivor competition, a competition that you, at the very least, need 310 stories and 40 poems to win. If you wrote the required ten stories and poems in all 35 categories to earn you the prized 5 bonus points for each category, how much does that work out to be per post should you win first prize? By my calculations, winning the $500 first prize earns you $1.43 for every story or poem posted with half that amount for second place, seventy-two cents?

Now, with that huge jackpot in mind, I really do not understand some of the hostile and smug comments that I have received over this contest. It is just a contest. What is the big deal? Why so serious?

I wonder how much $500 works out to per word or by the hour. Not very much, I am afraid and too depressing a number to list here. Yes, now I can see why contestants are treating this competition so seriously and sandbagging the other contestants. They want that $1.43 per post. Hello people, less we forget, it is not about the money, it is about the writing and about the story.

Yet, the one thing that the person, who made the hostile and smug comment to me, repeated was that my suggestions for improvement are welcome. Well, that is certainly good and encouraging. Okay, well, here are my suggestions for improving the Survivor Contest as listed below.

Of course, my first suggestion is to increase the prize money, by tenfold, $5,000 for first place, $2,500 for second place, $2,000 for third place, etc. Also, the winner of the Survivor Contest is guaranteed to have one of his or her stories published, Literotica's choice, whenever Literotica decides to publish another book on erotica.

The way the rules are now, regarding immunities, when a contestant wins immunity, they must post that immunity to their scorecard within a week, before the next immunity drawing. The same rule should apply and be in place for those who write stories to post to the Survivor contest. If you write a story, submit a story, and your story is posted and you are a contestant in the Survivor competition and want that story to be counted in your score, you must record your story to your scorecard within a week after the post date; otherwise, you cannot post it to your scorecard and claim your points. In that way, the other contestants can, actually, see who is a contestant in the game by watching the points of others progress by the stories that they write and as they are posted. That, to me, is not only the fair way but, also, the competitive way.

The way that it is now, contestants do not have to register until near the very end of the game and end of the year and do not have to post any of their scores until near the very end of the game and end of the year. Now, the other contestants have no idea who is playing the game or will play the game until near the very end of the game and end of the year. The other contestants do not know the scores of those who will compete against them until they post their scores near the very end of the game and end of the year. To me, that is just not right.

To me, it is a bit idiotic that a contestant does not have to update his or her scorecard until near the very end of the game and end of the year. I dare say that everyone is a sandbagger but me, Direlilith, and a few of the others who have continually updated their scorecards, as their stories post. As I do not know all the contestants nor have I been anal enough or interested enough, as to check everyone's sheet and match it to their scorecards, the winner of this competition could be shocking, to say the least.

Besides, if the person did not post anything to their scorecard, there is no way to know, unless I sat down with the auditors from a CPA firm to verify and validate everyone's scores by going through everyone's personal story sheet, one by one. Even then, I would be unable to verify who was just writing stories and who was going to sign up for the Survivor Contest on December 31st.

Then, of course, there are those who will not post any stories until the very last week or two of the contest. How do you compete against that? You don't. How is that fair? It isn't.

My suggestion is that all Survivor contestants must post their points as soon as their stories hit the board. Aren't we both very accommodating, Direliltih, I, and a few of the others by revealing our hand to those others who write their stories in secret waiting until the time when they can surprise everyone with how well they fooled them into thinking that they were not even playing the game?

"Ha, ha, joke is on you, dumb ass, for posting your scores ahead of time. I win and you lose."

Oh, sure, you can get around that rule of posting your score to your scorecard as soon as your stories post by posting most of your stories in the last six weeks of the year, as someone did last year. I won't mention the person's name, he or she knows who they are and will probably reveal themselves by leaving a nasty comment to this story. Hey, besides, they did nothing wrong. That is the way of the Survivor contest and there is no rule against doing just that. Only, it smells. I, on the other hand, am from a different school. I, on the other hand, call it cheating.

Can you imagine a runner who finishes the Boston or New York Marathon making a deal with the judges?

"Psst, don't tell anyone that I have already crossed the finish line and have already won the race. I want to see the looks on the other runners' faces as they cross the finish line thinking that they actually thought that they have won the race and that they thought that they even had a chance of winning the race."

Imagine your favorite baseball team not posting any of their scores until the end of the ninth inning.

"Who won the game? I don't know, yet, there is still one more out to go in the ninth inning?"

Imagine watching the Olympic Games and the skiers, skaters, and runners not allowing the judges to divulge their scores until the gold medal ceremony.

"Hey, Joey Cheek, get off the platform, you did not even win a bronze medal, I won the gold, my friend Dave won the silver, and Bill, here, won the bronze. We just posted our secret times and we all beat you. Boy, you were pretty dumb to post your time upfront because that gave us the extra edge knowing what you, the competition scored, and revealing to us the time to beat. Moron."

Actually, other than to secretly pump up your scorecard and win the Survivor contest by pulling the rug out from those who have played the game in earnest, what purpose does that serve Literotica and the readers of this board to have nearly 200 stories dumped on the board by one writer towards the end of the competition and at year end? Now, multiple 200 stories by a dozen or so writers who are intent on winning this insane game by dumping all of their stories, at the same time, on the board the last few weeks of the competition.

I'll tell you what that does do, however, those writers who are not part of the competition and who post their stories on the board, in good faith, hoping that it will remain there for a week are gravely disappointed and not fairly treated.

What happens when the fever pitched and determined Survivor contestants, pressured to get all of their squirreled away stories in the Survivor contest by year end, dump thousands of stories on the board in a matter of weeks and push every other story that those other writers, who were not even entered in the competition and who hoped that their story would remain on the board a week, fall off the board within hours. Nobody wins the way the contest is now. Surely, not the reader, unless they are speed readers and have no life to live, other than to sit 24/7 and read stories that flash by their eyes at an insane rate. Surely, the writer, who writes his story in earnest only to watch it disappear in a few minutes instead of in a week because the survivor contestants are backlogging the board and dumping hundreds of stories on the board daily, is not a winner. Surely, the contestant, who writes his story hoping that the readers will read, vote, comment, and give feedback, is not a winner as his story is flushed, too, along with all of the stories of the non-survivor participants. It just does not make sense. It just is not right.

Since Literotica emanates from the United Kingdom, I think, doesn't it? I was going to list as a suggestion that the winner of Survivor gets to meet the Queen of England and is an invited special guest of the 2008 American Idol. After all, American Idol is Simon Cowell's baby and he is British. Surely, Literotica, if they are located in England has connections with Simon to arrange that as a prize for the winner. It is a small island, after all.

Yes, I am aware that Simon lives in Beverly Hills but that is just a telephone call away.

Also, for a future Survivor contest, I think that a good grand prize would be a Mini Cooper S convertible. What do you think? How about a British racing green one with tan interior, tan top, six speed manual, and with the John Cooper Works GP kit. Now, that is a prize worth fighting and sandbagging over.

My last suggestion is, of course, to declare me the winner, now, pay me the prize money and start a new competition using all of my above suggestions.