The Good Provider Ch. 03

I want to thank all the readers who have commented, either here on Lit or via PM, about this story. I love hearing what you think! I'm working on the conclusion of the story right now, and hope to submit it shortly. For those of you who have read Chapters 1 and 2, you know this is a slow build-up. This chapter doesn't have any actual sex either, but I promise it is on the way in the conclusion.

As Colleen moved through the living room toward the hall, she glanced out the bay windows which provided a clear view of the large back yard. Tiny white Christmas lights still twinkled on the eaves of their mother's small studio out back, even though it was now late January. The rest of the studio was in darkness. Their mother, Silvia Prentice, had been heartbroken at her husband's death, but time and new activities worked their healing power. After her initial shock of loss and sadness eased off, Mrs. Prentice found she had a lot of lonely hours on her hands. She started playing bingo at the Senior Center once a week, joined a bowling league, and even braved going out dancing with friends once in a while. Along the way, she made a number of new friends. That morning, she had left with one of those new friends, a 75-year old gentleman, on a cruise to Alaska! How wrong is it, that my mom is probably getting some nooky right now, at her age, while I'm left high and dry? wondered Colleen.

Reaching her bedroom, she sank down onto the bed, stomach churning. Raising her glass, she noticed her hand was trembling, and she let out a rueful laugh. My god, what's the matter with me? I know it's been months since I got laid, but to go completely to pieces just because Matt touched me. My own brother! I almost rubbed up on him right there in the kitchen, like a cat in heat!

She kicked her shoes off and wiggled her feet. Damn pointy toes – designed for sex appeal and definitely not for comfort! Carefully unrolling and removing her thigh high stockings, she placed them on the bed next to her. Falling back against the pillows, Colleen stared up at the ceiling and reflected on the last few weeks of her life.

Returning to her home town had been interesting, to say the least. For one thing, she could no longer hide behind a pair of dark glasses and feel confident that she could walk down the street without being noted and recognized by someone. It didn't matter that she hadn't lived in this town for eleven years; she still knew a lot of people and they knew her. A couple of the cashiers at the grocery store were former classmates; a high school boyfriend was now a local cop; her seventh grade English teacher, Mrs. Gowry, called the bingo numbers at the Senior Center every Thursday night. Beyond that, she passed numerous other familiar faces, people she knew at least well enough to nod to, or wave hello when they passed in the street.

Colleen was working part-time at a bookstore downtown, and taking a full class load in the afternoon and evenings at the local beauty college. It had been Matt who suggested she consider returning to her original career goal of obtaining her cosmetology license. The idea had appealed to Colleen and she was happy to find out she was far from the only student over thirty in her classes. She had already made several friends that could turn out to be future business partners.

Almost every one of them, except her friend Trey, who was gay, asked if she was "seeing anyone special?" or wondered when she was going to settle down. Trey was only twenty-three and didn't see the point in settling down. "Honey, when there are so many fine guys out there, why pick just one?"

What was she supposed to tell them? "Well, I would love to settle down, but you see, there's this little problem. I'm in love with my brother. What's even worse is that I'm in lust with him. I want him inside me so deep that I don't know where he ends and I begin; I want him to walk into my room right now, rip my clothes off and fuck me so hard the neighbors call the police because of all the screaming. He's in my blood and has been ever since we started playing touchy-feely during his haircuts. I'm so pathetic that I've been dating a man for three years just because he looks like my brother!"

Yes, it was true. She had been shallow enough to date Brian, put up with his infidelities, his cheapness, his selfishness in the bedroom and out, simply because he looked amazingly like Matt. The pale imitation had been satisfactory until she was face to face with the real thing every day.

Meeting Brian tonight for what was supposed to be the start of a wonderful "romantic" week-end had finally made Colleen face the reality that their relationship had been built on false pretenses.

Brian worked as a pilot for another airline, and they had been fixed up on a blind date by mutual friends. They arranged to meet at a local restaurant, in the small bar tucked off the waiting area. Colleen arrived first and seated herself at a small table that faced the entrance. When Brian walked into the lounge, holding a single red carnation (as they agreed, so as to better recognize each other), Colleen felt an instant rush of pure attraction. He looked vaguely familiar, the shape of his nose, his dark blond hair, or maybe it was the way his mouth quirked up on one side when he smiled. She couldn't think of who it was he reminded her of; all she knew was she found him incredibly sexy.

Their first date passed in a blur; afterward Colleen couldn't remember much of what they talked about, only that she had been instantly smitten with Brian. The night ended at his apartment, the attraction mutually acknowledge as they tumbled into bed. The sex itself had been a little rushed and fumbling, but she put that down to first time jitters. Snuggled against Brian afterwards as he snored in his sleep, Colleen felt nothing but satisfaction and contentment.

After that, they fell into an easy routine. Colleen understood that Brian's schedule always took precendence over hers, and became adept at dealing with last minute cancellations of plans, whether it was Brian calling to cancel because he got called to cover a flight, or a meeting with one of his friends ran longer than expected, or Colleen cancelling plans she'd made with her friends because Brian called without prior notice and wanted to see her. She became the kind of woman she'd sworn she never would, treating her friends as filler for any free time she wasn't spending with Brian. Some of her friends tried to gently share their concerns about the way Brian treated her; but love, infatuation, call it what you will, usually doesn't leave a lot of room for comon sense. If your friends can't see your man's innate fabulousness, you think they don't get to see his "real side," the way he is when it's just the two of you, alone together. Besides, if you're happy with the way things are, then why should your friends get all bent out of shape?

Seeing the writing on the wall, most of her friends stopped saying anything at all; and others simply began to drift away. Her friend Tilly gave her one last warning, "You shouldn't judge a book by its cover, Colleen. You think that man is all that and a bag of chips, but I'm telling you, he's gonna let you down some day." Colleen remembered how she rolled her eyes and laughed at Tilly, thinking "yeah, right."

***

Colleen got up from the bed and finished undressing. She wrapped herself in a dark red silk kimono robe and stepped into the hallway. Raising her voice, she called down toward the living room. "Matt? Is it okay if I use your shower?"

Matt leaned forward on the couch. He could only see Colleen's silhouette in the hallway. "Sure, go ahead." What he wouldn't give to be invited to join her!

"Ta," Colleen lifted her hand in thanks and walked toward the end of the hall and into the master bedroom. As usual, it was a mix of cyclone-disaster-area with one or two small spots where organization ruled. Matt's bed was neatly made, but clothes lay strewn messily on the floor around it; the sliding closet doors were open, revealing shelves filled haphazardly with shoes, crumpled shirts, sports equipment, and who knew what else. At the work station in one corner of the room, pens and pencils were neatly placed in a round cup, and Matt's client folders were neatly lined up in a stacking organizer. A whiteboard mounted on the wall beside the dest had the headline, "TO DO," and was covered with cryptic notes in Matt's slanted handwriting. Matt's calendar book lay closed on the desktop. Colleen knew if she opened it to peek inside, daily appointments would be neatly written on each page.

She took all this in with just a glance, making her way toward the master bathroom. She nearly tripped over one of his large shoes, hidden underneath a dirty sweatshirt on the floor, and she picked it up and tossed it toward the closet.

Every time Colleen walked into Matt's bathroom, she coveted it anew. First of all, it was roomy. The previous owners had completely remodeled and enlarged this room. As you walked in, a long granite-top vanity was to the immediate right, fitted with double sinks. Mismatched antique mirrors sat above each sink. On the left was a jacuzzi tub, enclosed by deep bench seating covered in earthtone tiles. Just beyond the tub was the shower, tiled in the same earthtone as the tub and surrounded by glass block. The shower was wide and roomy and the crowning glory was the deluxe rainfall shower head.

Colleen turned on the water and as soon as the temperature was right, stepped under the pulsing spray. The beat of the water against her skin slowly began to work out the knots of tension in her neck and back. As she washed and rinsed her hair, she replayed the events of earlier that night.

* * *

She had packed very little for the week-end; an outfit to wear if they went sightseeng during the day, another dress for dinner out on Saturday night, several sexy outfits for the bedroom, and a toothbrush. She hoped that the daytime outfit and the Saturday night dress never made it out of her travel suitcase. Six long months of occasional phone sex, unsatisfying e-mails, and frequent use of her friend, BOB (battery operated boyfriend) had left Colleen more than ready to spend the entire week-end in the hotel room with Brian, behaving like lust-crazed teenagers. Well, that and daily contact with Matt.

Matt strolling into the kitchen in just his pajama pants in the mornings, scratching his chest and yawning. Falling asleep in front of the tv and waking to find he'd placed an afgan over her in the night. Smelling his aftershave as they passed each other in the hallway. Looking at his hands as he ate at the dinner table, the way he held his fork, the way he'd wink at her as he complimented the meal. His casual, "I'm outta here babe," as he left for work in the morning. Coming into the kitchen to see him bent over peering into the fridge as he looked for a late night snack, wanting to smack that fine jean-clad ass. Laying in bed just down the hall from him, as she played with her nipples and her pussy, hoping the whir of BOB didn't carry beyond her bedroom door, thinking of Matt and wondering if he was stroking himself off too.

It was all too much! Her sexual tension had built up to such a point that she needed relief, and lots of it. The long-awaited week-end with Brian arrived just in the nick of time.

After she finished up for the day at the beauty college, Colleen used the student locker room to change. Being a Friday, most of the other students had stopped only long enough to clean their equipment, hang up their smocks and leave for the day. Colleen had the locker room to herself as she freshened up, put on the thigh high stockings Brian loved, and slipped into a short black cocktail dress. Brian didn't want to drive all the way from Billings to her home town, so she agreed to meet him roughly halfway. By the time she parked in the lot at the Embassy Suites where she was to meet up with Brian, her nerves were jangling with anticipation.

Almost immediately, the perfect week-end Colleen envisioned started to fall apart. Brian was already seated at the bar, and he had company. A petite blond sat perched on the bar stool to his left, looking up into Brian's face and laughing at something he'd just said. What the hell is this? Colleen's Irish temper started to rise, and she drew a deep breath, flipped her long brown hair back over her shoulder, and marched over to find out what the fuck was going on.

Of course, Brian had bluffed and bullshitted his way out of the moment, claiming that "Sheila, I believe that was your name, right?" had only sat down a minute before. Sheila was waiting to meet someone herself, wasn't she? Colleen spared Sheila only one cold glance, before suggesting that perhaps she and Brian go ahead and check in to their room.

At the reception desk, she hesitated as they signed in, to see if Brian would offer to pay for the room. When he continued to make polite small talk with the clerk, Colleen opened her wallet and presented her credit card. She was determined to get this week-end back on the right footing. Maybe some room service; a little mood music; slip into one of her sexy outfits. Forget about that stupid blond. She probably had just sat down anyway. She couldn't really blame Brian for that; he was right, she was sometimes unreasonably jealous.

However, once they got into the room, Brian stretched out on the bed and turned on ESPN! When she suggested some champagne from room service, he'd said "Sure, if you want to pay through the nose for it. If you order something, would you get me a beer?"

The final straw was after she took a shower so she would be as sweetly fresh as possible for him, puffed and patted herself dry, dabbed some perfume between her breasts; after room service arrived and she tipped the boy; after she put on her new midnight blue babydoll bought especially for this week-end; after they toasted each other; after Brian had stripped off down to his socks.

Lying in what she hoped was a seductive pose on the bed, Colleen shyly asked Brian if he would like to go down on her. He took one look at her neatly trimmed pussy and shook his head. "No, I've told you before. You should shave it all off if you want me to even think about that!"

That's when the shit hit the fan. Or rather, when Colleen finally snapped and let him have it.

Brian never saw it coming.

"You goddamned selfish son of a bitch!" She jumped up off the bed and spun around, taking in the telephone book sitting out on a little side table. She grabbed it and threw it at Brian's head. He ducked and it bounced off his shoulder to the bed.

"Fuck! What the hell is your problem Colleen?"

"My problem is that you're fucking watching sports!" Damn it felt good to throw that book at him. What else can I throw?

"Huh?" He stared in confusion at the crazy woman before him.

"No, you know what my real problem is? You wanna know? It's that you are a lousy lover!" She bent down and picked up one of her shoes and flung that at him. Brian scrambled off the bed, holding a pillow in front of him.

"You're cheap! You're probably sleeping around on me! And you suck in bed! No wait a minute, you don't suck in bed. You don't lick, you dont' suck, you don't nibble, and your idea of foreplay is a quick squeeze of my boobs and thirty seconds of uh, uh, uh! was it good for you too baby!"

"You're crazy, you know that? I drive all the way out to this podunk town because you beg me to meet up with you, and this is the thanks I get?" Brian started grabbing for his clothes, keeping one eye on Colleen in case she decided to throw anything else at him.

Just as quickly as her anger came to the surface, it subsided. She collapsed into a chair and just stared at Brian. The sight of him hopping around trying to get the second leg of his pants on started her giggling. He glared at her.

"I'm sorry," she said, trying to stop laughing. "I really am. I don't know what came over me just now."

"I don't know either and I don't care. I'm getting out of here!" Brian jammed his shoes on and looked around for his wallet.

"Hey Brian, come on." Colleen couldn't believe that the week-end, hell, their relationship, was ending like this. What just happened here?

Brian's pride had been badly hurt. His face set in hard lines, he ignored Colleen's plea and walked to the door, pulling it open. He couldn't resist one last parting shot. "You were getting a little too old for me anyway Colleen," he sneered and then the door slammed shut behind him.

* * *

Colleen's tears trickled down her face, blending with the shower spray. How dumb am I, spending three years with a guy who never really gave a damn about me? Then she resolutely brushed the tears from her eyes. I've wasted enough time on Brian. It's time I faced reality, not fantasy.

* * *