The Long Absence: Allen's Story

Author's note: This is a long story. Nine chapters. Sex doesn't happen until chapter 6. Please read the disclaimer, at the end, when you finish the story.

Chapter 1

This was it. No more hiding, no more running. The end for him, he thought as the plane landed. Sitting in his seat as the plane taxied to the hanger with a look of defeat on his face, Allen sighed and looked down to his right thigh where the large piece of metal was removed after the IED went off near his unit's vehicle outside of Baghdad.

She was the last person he wanted to see. She was the last person he wanted to know. She was the last person he wanted any involvement at all with. He didn't like the woman. But this was it. He couldn't avoid her any longer. After being honorably discharged from the marines, he was sent home to her – his mother.

She didn't know he was on the way. In fact, he hadn't spoken to her since he graduated high school five years prior. He immediately joined the marines and left. He Left everything and everyone, not looking back or making any effort to communicate with her. All except his grandmother.

They were like best friends. She practically raised him. She would be at all his sporting or school events. She helped him pick out a tuxedo for the prom. They would talk at length about any issues he was having with friends, school, and his mother. His grandmother was his mother as far as he was concerned. He begged and pleaded with her to allow him to contact her only, not his mother. After many arguments over the issue, and the fact that he never once called or sent his mother a card, his grandmother, Robin, accepted the fact that Allen will do what he pleases and tried to let the issue go. It hurt her to think of this divide between her daughter and grandson, but this was the way it was going to be and she accepted it. She would lie about not hearing from Allen, when she did, in order to spare her daughter's feelings. Or she would make up a story about reading something on the news about his unit in Iraq.

Allen's mother, Krista, knew of the rift between the two of them. She knew that when he left, that he wouldn't contact her or even care to. She knew that she may never see him again, and it broke her heart. When he left on that bus to Paris Island, South Carolina for basic training, her world collapsed. The worst part is that day is that she knew it was her fault. What was her crime so-to-speak? Sex.

To Krista, sex was just like breathing, eating, drinking, and sleeping. To her, sex wasn't something that she only received every once in awhile if she was lucky or if she met the right guy at the right time and so on. No. Orgasms by herself or with other people, was a regular part of her, sometimes daily, routine. Deciding which of her friends to go out on a Friday night with and end the evening with sex was like deciding on which restaurant to eat lunch at. Fast food? No. Chinese? Maybe tomorrow. I know! Mexican!

It was as simple as that. She had many, many friends to choose from. Did she want one of her black friends, for a night of sucking and riding a big black cock? Perhaps she wanted one of her female friends, for a night of licking and grinding pussies. This was her life for many years. All through Allen's childhood and up until the day he left, presumably for good.

She threw it all away, she threw her child away. She spent so much of her time with her friends, going out to parties, events, a couple orgies here and there, that she rarely saw her son. She'd drop him off at grandma's when he was young. As he entered his teen years, he didn't need a babysitter, so she wouldn't have to take him to his grandma's. Instead he would be in his room, with the door closed covering his ears as best he could so he couldn't hear her sounds of ecstasy with whoever she was with for the evening. He felt awkward and embarrassed. I think any young teen would.

As he got a little older and obtained a driver's license , he would leave the house, driving a few miles down the road to his grandmother's. Robin would listen to him as he'd complain about the racket, complain about not wanting to hear his mother having sex. She'd comfort him he'd stay the night there and come home early the next morning after his mother's guests have gone.

He hated it. He hated that she'd flaunt her sexuality around like that. "Why does she have to be like that? Why can't she act her age or something...you know? I don't want to hear that crap. It's all she ever does!" He exclaimed as his grandmother put her arms around him.

The issue ran much deeper though. Robin knew it, even if Allen's teenage mind didn't yet. Krista wanted sex for various reasons. Her father ran out on her at a young age, she may have had low self-esteem, and finally, because she could so easily have it. At 5 foot 7, 120 pounds, she, like her mother, was gorgeous. She looked years younger than she actually was, had long, thick light brown hair down to the small of her back, and a body that bordered on perfection. With perfect C-cup sized breasts, and sexy, tight core, and a great butt, any man or woman would love to sleep with her. Her dark green eyes and full lips enabled her to finish a man by just staring deeply into his eyes as she would ride him to her own orgasm.

Krista started early, having sex regularly in high school, by the time she was a 19 year old college student she had become pregnant with Allen. His father was one of the remaining basketball players at her college that she hadn't slept with. She never told him she was pregnant and that was that.

With Robin working constantly to provide for Krista (and then Allen) because her husband left when Krista was 12, she was unable to monitor her activities as well as she would've liked to. However, she was able to stay in college and graduate. But the partying and sex didn't end after Allen was born. She wanted it and needed it. And she got it in excess. She majored in marketing and got a job as a marketing assistance, working (and sometimes sleeping) her way to upper management by the time she was in her late twenties.

She would sleep with clients after an evening of drinking. Or she would have wild, passionate nights with older, often married, executives at her company. Sometimes she'd be out of town for a week at a conference with a female coworker. Needless to say, they rarely left their hotel room during the evening. Moans, grunts, and cries of two women in ecstasy filling the hotel hallway outside their door.

Which was the first reason for Allen's resentment toward her: She was never around. She was always working, attending events, going on dates, or at the gym. If she was home, she was with a guest in her bedroom. She was never mean, often saying "hi sweetie" as she passed her son in the hallways, but she just wasn't there for him when he needed her. She was out or busy, and since this lifestyle was conditioned at such a young age, it never occurred to him to talk to her and build some kind of relationship. Would she be open to that? In his anger filled mind, he assumed she didn't care at all. This is why his grandmother is far more of a mother-like figure than Krista. She seemed to care.

The night of his 18th birthday party, which consisted of Robin and Krista singing happy birthday to him, blowing out some candles on a cake, and giving a few presents, Robin became aware of the second issue Allen had with his mother. At around 9pm that evening, Krista left his "party." She got up, grabbed her purse, and left.

"Happy birthday sweetie. Gotta go!" She cheerily said as she got up from the table, giving him a peck on the forehead and headed out the door. "Love you!" She whispered as she left, the two of them watched her walk across the lawn toward her car in her black cocktail dress.

Allen just sighed and shook his head. "See ya." He muttered, as he got up to help is grandmother clean the kitchen.

That's when it occurred to her: He was lonely. But that wasn't the only thing. Maybe he was feeling something that a shy, introverted, teen may feel from time-to-time. Something that all teens feel. Something a teenager with a sexually open and active mother may feel. Was it jealousy that she had such a socially and sexually active life and not him? Possibly. She then turned around and watched him clean some dishes in silent. He was tall, dark brown hair, fairly muscular, and very attractive – at least in her opinion.

"Could he be....?" She thought to herself, quickly shaking her head to dismiss the thought.

"Oh but I bet he is. He's horny. He's getting no relief, and lives with someone who constantly does get relief." She thought, as that seemed to make sense now. He was around someone who getting laid regularly and he wasn't getting anything.

"Poor kid" She thought as she stepped up behind him and wrapped her arms around his midsection. Robin thought about the last time she had sex. It was several months ago, a younger guy, in his 30s. It was nice. She smiled as she reminisced, holding her grandson tightly from behind, pushing her double-d enhanced breasts into his back.

"It'll be ok," she said aloud to him. He said nothing and continued cleaning the dishes.

She held on to him a few more moments. She dismissed a few very naughty thoughts of how she could help this young man, laughing quietly to herself. "I love you Allen." She squeezed and let him go.

"Love you too, " he muttered as she walked away.

It all made sense now, his disdain for his mother. Anger, mixed with jealousy, mixed with zero sex life. Robin could empathize with him. To him, his mother was a slut that didn't care about him. She could understand why he up and left like he did after high school. What she didn't expect was his mother's heart to be as shattered as it was.

The day Allen left for basic later in the summer, was one of the worst days of Krista's life. It was then she realized her failures. When she saw Allen hold Robin for a long, loving, embrace, while Krista received a brief, polite, hug, she knew she had failed. Failed as a mother, as a friend, as a supporter. The months that followed were horrible. They were filled with guilt and depression, but also sex. She immersed herself in even more sex. It was like her drug. Instead of chasing a high, she chased an orgasm.

Rock bottom was soon to happen, and it did around a year and a half after Allen left. She got news from a mutual friend that one of the men in a threesome she had a few weeks back had been diagnosed with HIV. Her heart stopped. She had to stop this. She had to get tested and get her life back on track.

So she did. Luckily, she tested negative for HIV, and it was then that a glimmer of hope appeared. Hope that she might actually hear from, or see Allen again. The last year and a half had been full of hopelessness and feelings of failure, however, when the test came back negative, she felt it was a sign that she's meant to see him again.

She started making drastic changes in her life. She discontinued hanging out with all her friends. She shunned dating. She quit the gym, and focused more on a home-based yoga program. Finally, she sought professional help. She needed help to examine her addiction and face the possible causes of it, along with help on re-building a damaged relationship with her son.

Two and a half years later, she was a new woman. She looked at love and life in a completely different way. She hadn't had sex since the HIV scare, and hadn't dated anyone. She learned to love herself, and not rely on others for validation or self-esteem. She was happier than she'd ever been. She had never been filled with so much hope that true love would happen for her. Her and her mother were also closer, a bond that Krista had ignored, like she had with her son. She felt so alive and free.

Fast forward one year. Robin is in tears as she sees Allen exit the cab in his military uniform. He offers to pay the cab driver as he reaches down for his cane, but is told his ride is free. He turns around and is smothered by Robin's embrace. The hold each other for what seemed like 10 minutes, before walking inside, holding hands. She helped sit on the couch and took his cane. She looked different, he thought. She was 57 the last time he saw her. She looked 47, but now, she is 62 and he could see age catching up to her. No longer did she look 10 years younger, but maybe only 5 – like someone in their late 50s. Her hair was dyed light brown with blonde highlights and cut short. She still had a great figure, as she still exercised regularly.

Allen looked different too. Studies in photography have shown that war ages people. Photos taken of soldiers before their deployment show slightly younger and freshed faced individuals. In a matter of a couple years, some of them appear to have aged quite a bit. Stress, anxiety, and environmental extremes can do that.

"So when do I get to meet him?" he asked after several more minutes of hugs on the couch.

"Ha! Soon, I supposed. He's out of town until next week." She answered; referring to her boyfriend she had told Allen about on his latest phone call.

"Well...alright." He chuckled, looking down, still holding her hand.

They talked for hours, he told her everything about what had happened to him. The leg injury, discharge, everything. It was a wonderful feeling to be back here with her.

As dinner time approached, Robin got up to head toward the kitchen to warm up some leftovers for them. He followed her and stood behind her, wrapping his arms around her, resting his hands on her flat stomach. He was taller than he was at 18. He grew several inches, reaching a height of 6 foot 3. Robin noticed he was more muscular now too, very muscular. She reached up to place a hand on the tricep of his left arm. He held her for a minute or so as the microwave finished its task. She leaned back into him and closed her eyes. He leaned down and nuzzled into her neck, as he gently rubbed her stomach. Thoughts of his 18th birthday popped into her mind. She smiled slightly as she thought about what else might've grown.

"Can I stay here with you?" he whispered. "I'm don't know if I can see her yet..."

He trailed off and Robin opened her eyes, turning around to look him, she smiled weakly. "Sweetie, listen, we need to talk about her. Come and sit."

He followed her into the living room, sitting on the couch, holding her hand. "Gosh, you look so much like your grandfather....more so now, than when I last saw you."

He just smiled and nodded. Robin continued. "Your mother is a different woman now. Completely different. You leaving was a very difficult situation for all of us, but her especially. She's battled depression, and feelings of failure."

She sighed and continued on. "I really need you to let that anger and resentment go. Ok? It's not healthy and she is nothing like that person you knew. She's been going to therapy for quite awhile now."

She reaches up to caress his face. "Please, for me, have an open mind and heart about this. Ok? Let's eat and we'll go over to there to see her. She'll be home in an hour or so."

Allen sighed and looked downward again. "I don't know...."

"Look, think about what you've been through, the nightmare it must've been. We are so lucky that you are still alive. Surely, you've realized through your experience, that carrying around anger in your heart isn't a way to live. Right?"

He slowly looked up at her and nodded his head. "I don't like feeling this way."

"Well then let it go. Just let it go. She's different now, you'll see." Robin said as she leaned in to kiss his cheek. "You look so much like him," she said again, referring to her ex-husband and Krista's father.

Chapter 2

After they ate a quick meal, they headed over to his childhood home a few miles away to await his mother's arrival. On the short car ride over there, he felt slight relief, slight pressure lifting from his soul. Almost as if he was letting go and just enjoying the moment. He was going to see someone who cared about him, someone who had issues, yes, but deep down probably cared very much for him.

Robin opened the door with her spare key and Allen slowly walked in. He was taken back by how totally different the place looked. He walked around the corner into the living room and saw the furniture was different – it was a more gender neutral, not overtly feminine. He noticed nothing was overtly feminine. All the walls were painted a different color – a bland white color. "Interesting," he thought, "It doesn't look like I would've imagined a sex crazed wild woman would decorate, but more like a regular mom."

It actually looked somewhat plain. He was ok with that, it felt less threatening. He chatted a few moments with his grandmother about the changes she's made to the house, her clothing, her job. She didn't go into too much detail as she was hoping Allen and his mother would be able to talk about things.

On more thing he noticed, is pictures of him and his grandmother on the wall, and on small tables next to the brown leather matching couch and loveseat. He didn't recall ever seeing pictures of them around the house. He knew there were some, but they weren't put up; as if someone simply didn't have the time to do so. He looked over to the kitchen and notice how clean it was, everything was clean. Maybe his grandmother was right, maybe she is different now, maybe she's actually at home long enough to keep the house clean and not rely on a teenage son to do a crappy job. He looked up at the tall ceiling and saw no dust on the ceiling fan. A moment later he heard the front door open.

"Helloooooooo! You in my house mom?" a silly, playful, voice called out. Robin walked around the corner of the living to the front door.

"Hi sweetie, I was just....um..." she nervously answered as Krista put her bag down by the door.

"Hmm?" She smiled, back to her mother. "What's up?"

Robin cleared her throat and moved to the side. Allen appeared from around the corner. Krista caught the movement from behind Robin, she smiled weakly not fully processing what she was seeing. It was a tall man in some sort of military uniform. She stared blankly for a few seconds, and that's when it hit her. Her face went white, as though she had just seen a ghost. She covered her mouth with her hand and gasped. A couple seconds later, her hand at her mouth began trembling, her eyes watered up, her breathing was unsteady, and her heart was pounding. She realized who she was looking at.

Robin had moved behind Krista. "It's him. Go on..." she whispered, as her own eyes teared up. She gently pushed her to move toward him. At first Krista didn't budge. She couldn't. Her eyes were streaming and she was shaking as she just stood there looking at her son. In what looked like a very long sundress, extending down to her calves, and her sandals, she was dressed nothing like he remembered. No sexy outfit, cleavage showing dresses, or short skirts. She looked homely, plain almost.

Allen was experiencing something too. His eyes blinked rapidly and he could feel tears welling up in them. His own heart pounded as he watched her reaction. He cleared his throat, "Hi mom," he whispered, unable to speak at normal volume. He extended his arms slightly to her, his right hand holding the cane. Krista just stood there, crying, in shock of what she was seeing.

"Go on dear, it's ok," Robin comforted her from behind and nudged her again.

Krista slowly moved to him, and he moved to her, limping slightly. She closed her eyes and wept uncontrollably, as she stood against him, her head on his chest. He slowly raised his arms up to hold her, his left hand going into the long tresses of her hair, bringing her face against his chest.